A man named Arthur Pink once said to “cultivate the holy habit of seeing God’s hand in everything that happens to you.” I remember writing down those words and mulling them over, inspired by the thought that we can actually develop habits of a holy nature… Not just habits having to do with our daily routines, but habits we consistently practice in our spirits, hearts, and thoughts. As we grow in the likeness of Christ, “laying aside all superfluity of the flesh,” leaving behind the thought patterns and habits of the old man, we can train our hearts to consistently turn to these new habits and behaviors that the Spirit leads us into.

With this goal in mind, I pulled out my journals and my phone and began noting down all the quotes and phrases I had lately been collecting.

I wound up with a list of holy attitudes, practices, and concepts that I have decided to share here. These are derived from the teachings of various saints and Christian teachers (Oswald Chambers, Elisabeth Elliot, A.W. Tozer, to name a few) as well as Scripture. I believe that these attitudes and habits are diamonds gleaned from the mines of suffering and have been made available to us through the sacrificial obedience of those saints and teachers who, having first learned them in the fires of affliction, went on to share this wisdom with others.

(You may recognize some of the phrases you are about to read. I have not given their sources – frankly because when I wrote them down in my journal, I did not want to be distracted by who said what when, but rather, that I could read a simple list that would focus me on my daily walk. It is that same list that I share here.)

1. See the Hand of God in everything that happens to you.

One of the most challenging truths I have ever been faced with is that everything that happens to me, the good as well as the bad, has been orchestrated and allowed by the Lord. It is easy to forget this, to think, “Oh, this is only happening because so-and-so decided,” or “this would never have happened to me if it wasn’t for him or her!” But the truth is, nothing, nothing, nothing is out of God’s power, nothing is out of His hand, and nothing has touched you that He has not allowed.

It takes some time for our stubborn hearts to comprehend this. So here is a practical way you might approach it. Write down all the circumstances, situations, sufferings you find yourself in today. Your list may look very different from the list of your sister, friend, or coworker. (Even this can be a suffering. Perhaps you feel that your path is unlike any other’s. This is a cross in itself.)

My suggestion to you is this: after everything you write down (things that burden you, things that overwhelm you, a difficult circumstance, a conversation you had this morning!) add to it at the end: God’s Hand. This will help you remember that as long as you are walking with the Lord, every single thing you face, every circumstance you find yourself in, everything that is withheld and everything that is given, all of it – all of it – has been meted to you by the Hand of the Lord.

2. Be grateful for what is given, not resentful over what is withheld. (This is a way of life.)

In Philippians 4:12, Paul said, “I know how to be abased, and I know how to abound. Everywhere and in all things I have learned both to be full and to be hungry, both to abound and to suffer need.”

So what if what is given to you is hardship and suffering? What if the things you desire are withheld? Remind yourself to be grateful. Have the proper view of God in relation to yourself and this will render all blessings, great or small, as surplus to the ultimate blessing which is Christ Himself.

Like Paul, we must all go through the school of having a need and of being abased. We must learn to be like the poor widow, who had nothing to eat but bread and water and yet said, with tears in her eyes, “All this and Jesus too?”

3. Focus on mastery in circumstances, not mastery over them.

Oswald Chambers said this: “We all have the trick of saying – If only I were not where I am! – If only I had not got the kind of people I have to live with! If our faith or religion does not help us in the conditions we are in, we have either a further struggle to go through, or we had better abandon that faith and religion.” Simply put, if Christ cannot help you in this circumstance that you find yourself presented with then He cannot help you in any other either. Accept this circumstance as the cup which you must drink today and look not to overcome it, but to overcome in it.

Again, Chambers says, “The typical view of the Christian life is that it means being delivered from all adversity. But it actually means being delivered IN adversity, which is something very different.”

4. Trust God’s character when you don’t understand His actions.

John Newton, the man who wrote Amazing Grace, said this: “Healing and wounding are equally from His hand – and equally tokens of His love and care over us.”

God does not often reveal why He chooses to do certain things. But He has revealed His character. So let’s show ourselves faithful and begin to study the revealed character of God in His Word and then His actions will not seem to us cruel and unloving but instrumental in making us more Christlike.

5. Decide daily that you will surrender your will to the Lord.

The degree to which we learn this priceless truth will vary from believer to believer. Some of us have been Christians for years and have still not learned to surrender our will to the Lord. I have begun to see that God has very little use for these kinds of Christians. He cannot direct them to do His bidding for they will always consult their own hearts and feelings. King Saul had his kingdom taken away from him because he did not do the bidding of God through Samuel (1 Samuel 15). He had his own agenda, his own way of looking at things. He had not surrendered his whole will to God.

Let us be like David, who was precious in God’s eyes and sought God’s will and way above his own, be it ever so painful at times.

6. When God says “no” to something you want, trust that “no” and do not require an explanation.

Lilias Trotter, a humble missionary, said to “hold all things loosely in your hand, ready to be parted with without a struggle when He asks for them.” Another woman named Hannah Anderson said, “When we are denied the things our hearts long for we learn to long for the one thing that will never be denied us: God Himself.” It can be very painful when we are denied the things that we want. But if we trust the Lord, we can begin to see the denial as a gift. Denied everything else – whether material blessing, friendship, money, marriage, children – our hearts, which were made to desire, must learn to desire something better: God.

7. Be hard on yourself but easy on others.

The Pharisees were hard on others but easy on themselves. This is hypocrisy in its cruelest form. We must learn to be hard on ourselves, to submit readily to the high calling of the Holy Spirit and allow our flesh no room for expression, even as we remain patient, compassionate, and forgiving towards others. This may take us some time to learn but even so, we must allow the Spirit to bring us higher.

To take it a step further, we must also learn, as A.W. Tozer said, to carry our own cross but never lay one on the back of another. We may sometimes find ourselves heavy-laden with crosses that our fellow brothers and sisters lay on our backs. To bear these without harboring resentment in our hearts is a feat only the Spirit can bring us to accomplish! Bear your cross and bear the cross of your brother, but never, of your own will, lay a cross on another.

8. Become God’s happy slave, a foot-washer willing to do the small things for those around you.

There are many who would be willing to do great things for God but few who would be content to do the very small things that He asks of us. These small things could be the cleaning of a toilet or the washing of a load of dishes, the unseen task that goes unseen and unnoticed by all except God. Are we willing to do it? Think of our Lord Jesus who tied a towel around His waist and washed the feet of His disciples. The humiliation of this act should not be lost on us for this is the kind of service Christ calls us to. To do these things happily and without rebuttal requires a high level of submission.

9. Refuse to be swamped or overcome by the cares of this world.

The cares of this world will choke the Word from our hearts if we allow them to (see Mark 4:19). These cares could be, as Oswald Chambers says, simple things that distract our attention from God. Even a “passion for vindication” (always needing to vindicate yourself, refusing to be misunderstood, etc.) can be a care that consumes us to the point where we can no longer see God.

10. Sit mute and quiet (without murmuring or complaining) under affliction.

“Let him sit alone and keep silent, because God has laid it on him.” Lamentations 3:28.

It takes some time to learn this habit. But it becomes easier once we realize our first habit, which is to see God’s hand in all. To submit to the rod of affliction without murmuring (which is actually a rebellion against God, as Watchman Nee says) is to kiss the cross that makes us partakers of Christ’s sufferings.

11. Care not for how the world sees you. It will never see you as God sees you.

For those of us with a passion for vindication, those of us who are so easily beset by the opinions of others, we might as well come to terms with this now and “be dead to the opinions of friend and foe.” God alone sees and knows the truth.

12. View hard places as an opportunity to look only to God, to spend time in prayer, to learn long-suffering, gentleness, meekness: in short, to learn the love of Christ.

Elisabeth Elliot wrote these words and like many of her writings, God has used them to minister to me time and time again. This hard place you find yourself in today – use it! Use it as an opportunity. View it as fodder for your time spent in prayer, in the Word, in the learning of Christ’s love.

13. Cultivate communion with God. This will prepare you for whatever takes place.

Be in communion with God. Pray without ceasing. Spend time on your knees and when the battle comes, you will be ready.

14. Apply yourself to Scripture and apply Scripture to yourself.

Seek to make a daily habit of studying the Word. Give your whole heart and mind to it. Let the Word convict you, teach you, nurture, and change you. Always apply the Word to yourself and to your every situation and the Holy Spirit will guide you through.

Soli Deo Gloria!

About the Author:

Ruth Elijah is a twenty-something writer, memoirist, and freelance transcriptionist that grew up in Puerto Rico.